Brotherly Love

Brotherly Love

by Patricia Dailey
Senior Pastor, Bethel Revival Center
43 Norwood St.
Everett, MA 02149

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Philemon 1-3
Paul, a prisoner of Jesus Christ, and Timothy our brother, unto Philemon our dearly beloved, and fellowlabourer, and to our beloved Apphia, and Archippus our fellowsoldier, and to the church in thy house: Grace to you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Paul was aged, in prison at the time that he wrote this letter to his friend Philemon. He was a prisoner of Jesus Christ.

Philemon was a slave owner who had been converted. He had a love and a faith toward the Lord Jesus and a love for all saints. There was no prejudice in him. He was a good Christian, filled with the love of God. This was his testimony. No matter what nationality or race people were, he was filled with love for all. It was the love of God in his heart.

Love for All People

Do you have this same love toward the Lord Jesus Christ? Is your love toward all men? You know whether or not you have a love for all the saints. The Bible calls all of God's people saints (see Romans 1:7); all who have received Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour are saints.

We have to be careful that we have no prejudice against anyone. It makes no difference who it is that comes across our way. We should receive all believers as the children of God. All believers are part of the family of God, regardless of their nationality or the color of their skin.

Never allow prejudice to enter your heart. If you allow prejudice in your life, it will take root and lodging deep in your heart. We should love everybody, including the sinner. Yes, we should love the sinner (but not love their sin). We should love them so much that we would take the time to pray for them that they might be saved.

If there's any trace of prejudice in us, we need to get it out, for it is sinful. We had no say what nationality we would be or what color we would be. It was all in the plan of God for us. He brought us into this world; He made all peoples.

John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Yes, we should love all people, knowing that God loves them and sent His Son to die for them.

Paul prayed for Philemon. He had heard of his love and faith toward the Lord and toward all saints. This brought great joy and consolation (comfort) to Paul. The hearts of God's people were refreshed by Philemon.

Philemon 4,5
I thank my God, making mention of thee always in my prayers, hearing of thy love and faith, which thou hast toward the Lord Jesus, and toward all saints

Now, Philemon had an experience with God. He had a great faith and love for the Lord Jesus. The Scripture is very clear here to tell us of his great love.

Philemon 6,7
That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus. For we have great joy and consolation in thy love, because the bowels of the saints are refreshed by thee, brother.

Philemon and Onesimus

Now, Paul was writing to Philemon in behalf of Onesimus, a run away slave who belonged to Philemon. After he ran away, he got saved.

Paul was in prison here. We're not told where, but while he was in prison, this runaway slave came to the prison. And he was a convert of Paul's ministry. Here Paul is asking Philemon to receive Onesimus as a brother in the Lord. Paul's heart was that Philemon would receive him in love.

Under the Roman rule a slave would have been killed for running away from his master. Philemon could have done this, but he was a man of faith who had a great love for the Lord Jesus Christ — and a great love for all the people of God.

Paul's great desire was that Philemon receive Onesimus. He was concerned that Philemon receive him, no longer as a servant but, above a servant, as a beloved brother in the Lord.

Philemon 8-16
Wherefore, though I might be much bold in Christ to enjoin thee that which is convenient, yet for love's sake I rather beseech thee, being such an one as Paul the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ. I beseech thee for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten in my bonds: which in time past was to thee unprofitable, but now profitable to thee and to me: whom I have sent again: thou therefore receive him, that is, mine own bowels: whom I would have retained with me, that in thy stead he might have ministered unto me in the bonds of the gospel:

But without thy mind would I do nothing; that thy benefit should not be as it were of necessity, but willingly. For perhaps he therefore departed for a season, that thou shouldest receive him for ever; not now as a servant, but above a servant, a brother beloved, specially to me, but how much more unto thee, both in the flesh, and in the Lord?

Jonathan and David

The believers are called to love one another with brotherly love, as brothers and sister in Christ.

I Samuel 18:1-3
And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. And Saul took him that day, and would let him go no more home to his father's house. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.

This is brotherly love: being knit together as one. Jonathan loved David as his own soul and made an agreement with him.

I Samuel 18:4
And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David, and his garments, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle.

Jonathan wasn't a bit selfish. This was all in God's plan and purpose for David. We know that God loved David. He says that David was a man after His own heart. And even though David sinned later, God's mercy was great to forgive him when he truly repented. I want you to know that he really cried out to God, truly sorry for what he had done. He wanted to make it right with God, and God's mercies were great toward him in forgiving him.

Here in chapter 18 David has yet to become king. We want to take note how much Jonathan loved him, even as his own soul.

You and I can have such a love for others, from the depths of our soul. Sometimes people get hurt because someone they loved so deeply turns on them. Now, they might not have meant to turn away but have turned their attention to others and soon forgot you.

But I believe if we truly love someone from the depths of our soul, that we would do everything we could to keep that close relationship. Jonathan proved himself to be true to David. When his father, king Saul, was out to kill David, Jonathan came to where David was to encourage him. He stood by David.

They say that blood runs thicker than water, meaning that a family will be concerned for one another, looking out for one another. But Jonathan knew that his father was out to kill David. In fact, he even tried to kill Jonathan because of his love for David. Jonathan didn't want anything to happen to David because he loved him from the depths of his soul.

If we love somebody, we won't want to hurt them, neither do we want them to hurt us. We can have this type of love, where we love someone as our own soul.

Those with filthy minds think something different about the love Jonathan had for David. But their love was a pure love for one another, the pure love of God. And God had a purpose in giving Jonathan and David a deep love for one another.

This example in the Word shows us what brotherly love can do.

Paul's Great Love

And Paul, because of his great love for this runaway slave who was converted under his ministry while Paul was in prison, was concerned that Philemon receive Onesimus as a brother in Christ. Paul loved Onesimus and he also loved Philemon.

Some think Paul's writings were too harsh, but Paul spoke up when it was necessary. He wasn't out to please men; he was out to please God. He wasn't a men pleaser. He was a God pleaser. And he wanted to do what God had called him to do, even when it brought persecution, time and time and time again.

As you read this whole story in Philemon you can feel the love that Paul had for Onesimus. He wanted Philemon to receive him, not as a slave but above a servant — a brother beloved.

Philemon 17-21
If thou count me therefore a partner, receive him as myself. If he hath wronged thee, or oweth thee ought, put that on mine account; I Paul have written it with mine own hand, I will repay it: albeit I do not say to thee how thou owest unto me even thine own self besides. Yea, brother, let me have joy of thee in the Lord: refresh my bowels in the Lord. Having confidence in thy obedience I wrote unto thee, knowing that thou wilt also do more than I say.

When you read the salutations in Paul's other epistles, you'll see time after time he mentions having these churches in his prayers because of his great love and concern for them.

You can feel his deep love as you read his epistles. In Philemon you can feel his love for Philemon and Onesimus. And he told Philemon that if Onesimus had taken anything wrongfully — it doesn't say that he had taken anything when he ran away, but if he had — then Paul would restore it. We shouldn't read something into the Word that isn't there, but to declare it just as it says.

Paul was willing to take a debt on himself if that was the case. How many people would do that? That's love! Paul had such a great love toward God's people, and also for the lost and dying. We know it was God's plan and purpose for Paul to suffer persecution for His sake.

Love in the Church

Now, we also see another good example of brotherly love in Acts 20.

Acts 20:16,17
For Paul had determined to sail by Ephesus, because he would not spend the time in Asia: for he hasted, if it were possible for him, to be at Jerusalem the day of Pentecost. And from Miletus he sent to Ephesus, and called the elders of the church.

Paul gave the church at Ephusus a charge, and when he was through speaking, he prayed for them:

Acts 20:36-38
And when he had thus spoken, he kneeled down, and prayed with them all. And they all wept sore, and fell on Paul's neck, and kissed him, sorrowing most of all for the words which he spake, that they should see his face no more. And they accompanied him unto the ship.

The Ephesian believers had a great love for Paul, and he let them know they would see him no more — on this earth. He was concerned for them, that the elders would see that they were cared for and fed. And when he was finished speaking, he took time to pray for them all.

They had a great love and respect for Paul's ministry. Paul knew he would soon leave this old world, knew he would soon finish what God had given him to do. We can see love in the elders in the Ephesian church and the love Paul had for them. This is what brotherly love is all about.

Priscilla and Aquila

Romans 16:3,4
Greet Priscilla and Aquila my helpers in Christ Jesus: who have for my life laid down their own necks: unto whom not only I give thanks, but also all the churches of the Gentiles.

This married couple were Paul's helpers in Christ Jesus. We are told that for his life they had laid down their own necks. He was thankful for this, and so were all the Gentile churches.

This couple is always mentioned as Priscilla and Aquilla, never seperately. Perhaps it was because they worked together in the ministry. When a couple is called to the ministry together they should pull together, not envious of one another but walking together, doing what God would have them to do. This is a real blessing when a couple can work together in unity.

Brother Dailey and I have been able to work together in the ministry down through the years. And we find Priscilla and Aquilla working together in unity. They laid down their necks for Paul. We are not told how or where they jeopardized their lives for Paul's life.

This is true brotherly love in action. When you jeopardize your life for somebody else's benefit, that is certainly brotherly love. Jesus Christ laid down His life for us that we may have life. They whipped Him, beat Him, mocked Him, and crucified Him on the Cross. And this was for our benefit.

Sacrifical Love

II Corinthians 12:15
And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved.

Even though they loved him less, Paul said he still was glad to spend and be spent for their sakes. He would take time to work with them no matter what the cost. He had a true brotherly love for the Corinthian church. He had a great love for God's people. He loved the sinners, too, or he never would have gone through what he had to go through in reaching them with the gospel.

Philippians 4:1
Therefore, my brethren dearly beloved and longed for, my joy and crown, so stand fast in the Lord, my dearly beloved.

You can feel Paul's love here for the Philippian believers. Yes, Paul had a great brotherly love for the people of God and for the sinner.

Matthew 22:38,39
This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

We are to treat others in the way we would want to be treated. We are told to love our neighbor as ourselves — and everybody in this world is our neighbor.

Forgiving Love

Proverbs 10:12
Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins.

God is so gracious to save the sinner, delivering them from their sins.

Now, someone may have wronged you while they were in sin. But you are to love them, to pray for them, and to forgive them. Some of God's people don't like to hear this. They could never forgive that one who sinned against them.

Matthew 18:21,22
Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.

Listen, it doesn't matter what they have done to you, you are to forgive them. They may turn around and do the same thing again, but you are to forgive them again.

Authentic Love

John 15:12
This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

Our love should be sincere for one another: It should be genuine, real, authentic.

Romans 12:9
Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good.

Dissimulation is to put on a false appearance, to put on an appearance that you love someone when deep in your heart you don't really love them. You say you love them, but hide your true feelings against them.

I Peter 1:22
Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently

We can look at others in love from a pure heart. We can have a warmth of feeling toward them (loving them fervently) without any lust. Such a love can many times draw souls to Christ.

Love Is of God

I John 4:7
Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.

When we have been born again of the Spirit of God, we will find His love reaching out to others through us. God puts that love within us, even if we were not able to truly love others before we were born again. That great love lets us know we have been born of Him.

Philemon 17,18
If thou count me therefore a partner, receive him as myself. If he hath wronged thee, or oweth thee ought, put that on mine account

Paul had confidence in Philemon that he would do even more than what Paul had asked him to do.

From these Scriptures we have seen what true brotherly love is all about and what it can really do. It can help someone stay in the faith because they feel that love from God's people. We need this brotherly love when new people come to church. They need to feel that love without any prejudice or dissimulation. And we need to love our neighbor as ourselves — both the believer and the sinner.